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Anguish fills my outstretched hand, As I wait for someone to really care, All the happiness I've ever known, Has only just disapeared. You're so cold,Numb as I bleed in freezing rain, An external shell is all thats left to cover me, My pleas turn to rust time and time again, I want to start this over but I know it's the end.
I believe you're mine, But I'm only living a lie, But what the fuck aren't we all? Every image of you is less time to live and let die, Tied by the ankles I'm unable to fall.
Just tell me.... WHY?Why me? Is this the way things were always meant to be? WHY?Must I surround myself in lies? WHY? Why am I always the first to be blind......Goddamn it!
Where is god when I hate him? A faceless coward with his tail between his legs? All along I've wanted nothing but guidance, Still nothing comes even when I beg.
Rip away my ribs and devour every portion, Only to see the anatomy of a dying soul, Standby quietly to view a painless abortion, It now unfolds.... I'll never let you go, I'll never let go of myself, A lonely promise is all that staples me to a miserable life, Filling my emptiness inside with sadistic fake smiles, But everyday I continue suffers with this unending denial.
I've always guessed, how long it would last, I could never imagine, my thoughts were exact, Swallow your lies, to spit back in your face, What I thought was the whole plate was only a taste... Hung by your words, I drown alone in my fluids, Need to find a way out of this before I break and lose it, Unable to cope with fatal mistakes that I make, But your love's the last illusion I can fucking take.
Forced to lie in what I've made for my own, It cuts and it splinters, but I know this is home, Stabbing the sheets while my bed is aflame, I wish to cry out to you but this pain has no name.
Where is god......when I need him, Where has he always been for me, nowhere, Where do I find him to ask just why? Where do I find my life at when I die?.....
meaning: This song's title pretty much sums things up, it's about one day waking up and realizing your life is nothing but a pile of shit and that you really mean nothing to anybody.That one question pounds through your head, but there is no real answer....You just can't help believing that you were only put here to suffer and fuck up everything in your life and the lives of everyone you care about.Leaves you asking why.
Bled Inside You
You and me die together, In a cradle, seperated as one, A half-seen vision becomes a blur, beaten and blinded I can't find the words...
In my bleeding hand... I hold the answer, Fed to the worms, I am your cancer.
I can't stand another day (take it all away) and I have bled inside you (to find the dead you) I have seen the sickness in your eyes (they tell the real lie) and I still remain behind you (behind you)
You and me in a bed of glass, Comforting our united souls, Watching their lives drifting past, Why do dying angels fade so fast?
(repeat chorus and pre) I knew it all from the start (repeat chorus)
The tears drop, Upon my knife, Sometimes it hurts much more, To know you're so alive... I can't sleep, Without this burning pain, That my heart, Has died away in vain.
One promise... Is all that it takes, To push enough... to make me break. You promised forever but you lied, All I ever wanted was to die at your side, was dying at your side.
I can't stop dreaming, Can't stop believing, that someday, You won't leave and turn away, I know I've taken the beauty from myself, Wanting your hand and nothing else, Someday you'll wake up and see I need, You to come walking back to me.
I don't have the strength, I need to pull through, That part was left, Inside of you... I wish you could feel, How much it really hurts inside, Without a loving hand, You promised but you lied.
Thousands of unwanted tears, Fill my half empty soul, I've suffered through this, For so many endless years, Every time I ask myself why, I remember only your face, making me blind and I wait, hopelessly...failing, until I die.
(repeat chorus and post)
Sometimes I wonder, How it was I've failed again, Sometimes I cry, When I realize you're my best friend, Sometimes I wish, That I didn't let you down, Sometimes I watch, As you stomp my heart to the ground.
I wish I could relive, The ignorance that you loved me, Needed so much more than I could give, And you found it without me.
Meaning:This song was a song I wrote for someone about promises they made and have broken.I gave her the only copy of the song but kept the notes, I promised her that I would show noone.This is just a big circle of broken promises.